How to unify and create a calm family

How to unify and create a calm family

The key to a calm family can all begin with you.

ï Resolve family challenges. When your child acts out, it’s stressful for the entire family. Whether it’s biting other children, Screaming in rage, or being too shy to make friends – your child’s off-track behaviour is actually a cry for help. Enrol them in a martial arts that has a character development program, this will help you and them. You’ll be surprised by the changes you’ll see in your child after a short period of time. When you can see what’s going on for them and what’s going on in their mindset, solutions about how to change that mindset, and thus their behaviour, become more evident.

ï Respond instead of react. Parenting is a huge challenge. Just as your child acts out when he/she is upset, the emotional stress of parenting can send you “off track” as well.. Talking about your worries with a trusted listening friend/family member can help you think through a challenging situation instead of reacting.

ï Be playful, loving and firm. Discipline doesn’t have to be harsh. Likewise, being a loving parent doesn’t mean simply letting your kids run wild. Have your rules and don’t break them. finally, when you are looking for solutions from a place where there’s no longer an emotional reaction, you will automatically find more peace, acceptance and calm in the family home.

ï Create a bond that lasts for life.  These tips will help you maintain a close connection during adolescence and beyond.

By Shihan Bill Wakefield
   Owner/Chief Instructor
Combined Martial Arts Academy

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Bully Busting with Brains in the Martial Arts Classroom – Bill Wakefield

Nearly one-third of all school-aged children are bullied each year.*And it’s no longer just verbal or physical confrontations in the school yard. Kids are now cyberbullied through mean text messages and emails. Pictures, videos and cruel comments are posted on social networks.Bullying is a huge societal issue that we all need to address, but how do we handle bullying and prevent it?

Ask a handful of people what the best way is to address bullying, and you’ll likely get the response: “Fight back!” But encouraging bullying victims to respond through violence is not the answer.

The solution is educating children at an early age — first by helping them understand what bullying is, then by giving them the tools to appropriately respond.

At Combined Martial Arts, we’ve run an anti-bullying program for decades. The program is used and endorsed by a growing number of Queensland schools. It’s an important part of our Martial Arts curriculum.

How I approach the topic of bullying in our classes and seminars varies with the age group. But the objective is the same: to build self-confidence in all students and assurance that they have the right to grow up safe.

Role Playing is an Essential Part of Anti-Bullying Education

I work with children as young as three years old and with students in middle school and high school. Role playing is a critical part of our curriculum that demonstrates just what bullying is. 

For example, I may demonstrate bullying to our three- to six-year-old group by saying something like: “You’ve got germs.” Our young students are then given specific responses to say to a bully such as, “I don’t care what you say, I feel good about myself”. Students are also encouraged to respond through action such as walking away from the bully.

 

With six- to twelve-year-old students, we role-play but the context is different. We’ll role-play three to four scenarios, then review specific responses and actions to take to build up assertiveness.

The parents of this age group are also given homework, so that they can role-play with their children and open the lines of communication regarding bullying.

12 Ways to Walk Away with Confidence

In our program, we’ve also adopted guidance by Dr. Terrence Webster Doyle as provided in his Bully Buster program. These tips are particularly useful in working with students over the age of 10. 

1. Stand Up to the Bully — This can work but at times it can make some bullies angrier. You

must decide if you think this alternative will work in this situation with this bully.

2. Use Authority — Call a teacher, a police officer, a parent or someone you know to help stop

the bully from hurting you. This is not being a COWARD. This is stopping bullying before it

begins.

3. Use Humor — You can turn a scary situation into a funny one, but be careful. Have fun with

the bully rather than making fun of the bully.

4. Agree — If a bully insults you, agree with him/her. If you feel insulted, let your anger rise up,

watch it, and let it go.

5. Refuse to Fight — This may sound contrary to what you have always been told, but one way to stop conflict is to not fight, no matter what happens.

6. Use Trickery — Pretend you are sick. Pretend you have poison oak. Pretend you have some

infection the bully will get if he/she fights with you. Tell the bully someone is about to meet you

like your big brother or sister or parents.

7. Scream or Yell — A good shout can shock the bully and distract him/her for a moment, so you

can get away.

8. Make Friends — Treat the bully as a friend instead of an enemy. All bullies need admiration and respect.

9. Reason with the Bully — If you are a good talker, perhaps you and the bully can talk it out. If

you don’t argue or get angry, if you act friendly, you might convince a bully to not hurt you.

10. Walk Away — Don’t get into it. This is a simple and often overlooked way to end conflict before it ever begins. Walk away, BUT WITH CONFIDENCE.

11. Ignore the Threats — This is similar to simply walking away. You hear the threats and you

turn and walk away from the bully, even though the bully is calling you a coward and trying to

get you angry enough to react.

12. Take a Strong Stance — As a last resort, take a strong stance. This tells the bully you are

prepared to protect yourself if you are attacked. But hopefully, one or more of the other ways

will work first.

Role-playing, modifying the curriculum based on age group and incorporating the 12 Ways to Walk Away with Confidence are the primary elements that have worked in our anti-bullying program.

 

Let me know what you do in your business to educate and empower your students and members.

I strongly believe every Martial Arts school should incorporate anti-bullying curriculum into their programs. Together we can make a difference and break the cycle of violence and bullying in our communities.

 

Shihan Bill Wakefield is one of Australia’s pioneers of growth and success in the Martial Arts industry. He is the founder of Combined Martial Arts Academy (C.M.A.A.), the Gold Coast’s leading Self-Defense and Character Development Academy. Bill is also a well-known and prominent speaker on the subject of Martial Arts business, and a member of the Member Solutions Business Advisory Team.

*PACER’s National Bullying Prevention Center

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Soko Richard Norton

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Soko Richard Norton, who has been training in the martial arts for over 50 years, also holds an 8th Degree in Zen Do Kai Karate, Level 6 in Ukidokan Kickboxing and a 5th Degree in Chun Kuk Do Karate (under Chuck Norris).  As a result of his experience in a wide cross section of martial arts he is able to relate well to many schools wishing to take up Jiu JitsuTeam Norton BJJ has been operating for 5 years with a number of affiliate schools in Australia and the USA. 

All Instructors and schools are invited to attend this seminar and to meet Soko Richard Norton. It will be on the 9 th of March at Combined Martial Arts. Contact Shihan Bill for more details. Everyone is welcome to come this seminar.

 

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The Beginners doing kata

Our 4:00 class on a Monday and a Wednesday performing kata in front of the hole class. This builds their confidence and muscle memory.

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Little Dragons doing kata

Our little 5 – 6 year old students performing kata in front of the class. This works on their short term and long term memory.

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ISKA QLD Tournament Round 1

HAVE YOU ALWAYS WANTED TO COMPETE AT A WORLD CUP?
We guarantee by competing in ISKA QLD tournaments
” YOU WILL BE READY FOR THE WORLD”
share this with all your friends

Life Skills Talk by Shihan Bill Wakefield

000 Safety Training

000 is free from any phone.                                                                                                                                                               Memorise your address and phone number.                                                                                                                                       Call 000 if you see a fire, car accident, or if someone is sick or hurt.                                                                                               Describe what you see as clearly as you can.                                                                                                                                     Do not hang up until the operator tells you too.                                                                                                                                 Never call 000 as a joke 

Seths First Trophy

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One of our little little dragons , Seth with Shihan Bill , winning his first trophy ever on his first day of training in 2014

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Never to young to teach goals

Never to young to teach goals

Goal setting isn’t just for
adults, Martial Arts class can help you
accomplish anything you set your mind to!
How?
By learning how to set
goals and being taught the
“I CAN DO IT” attitude

Importance of knowing self Defence

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I would like to know what age people think we should be teaching our children self defiance . Remembering that bullying starts in kindly. I believe your never too young to say stop.

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